Ok, so let's dive right into deep Mormon doctrine here. Those young
men in black suits come to our door and if we let them in they tell us
some unbelievable story about some white boy, a dead angel, and some
gold plates. We are going to analyze every point of this amazing story
and find out if it can indeed hold up under pressure.
This post will focus on the second point of that discussion, The
Gospel blesses families.
First question/concern is families? Does that mean we have to be
married? This includes: Why is it necessary to be married? Does God
allow marriage or does he consider it evil?
Why is it necessary to be married? It is necessary because sexual
relations outside of marriage, fornication, is something we are told
to abstain from. Acts 15:20. "But that we write unto them, that they
abstain from pollutions of idols, and from fornication, and from
things strangled, and from blood." Marriage bound by law in Romans
7:2. "For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her
husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is
loosed from the law of her husband." As it is a law and we are subject
to laws Titus 3:1. "PUT them in mind to be subject to principalities
and powers, to obey magistrates, to be ready to every good work."
Also, we must be married to fulfill desire. We can find this in 1
Corinthians 7:2, 8-9. "Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every
man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. I say
therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they
abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is
better to marry than to burn."
Does God allow marriage or does he consider it evil? Let us begin with
Matthew 19:6. "Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What
therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." This
joining of man and woman is called marriage and we can see here where
God would approve of it. Also, we can see that the servants of the
Lord, even the 12 apostles are married in Luke 4:38. "And he arose out
of the synagogue, and entered into Simon's house. And Simon's wife's
mother was taken with a great fever; and they besought him for her."
In this verse, of course, we are referring to Simon Peter's wife. We
also learn from Christ that children are given in marriage in Luke
20:34. "And Jesus answering said unto them, The children of this world
marry, and are given in marriage." Being given in marriage again
reiterated in 4 Nephi 1:11. "And they were married, and given in
marriage, and were blessed according to the multitude of the promises
which the Lord had made unto them." Another point we could make is
that if God did not approve of marriage, Jesus would not have freely
attended a wedding ceremony. John 2:1-2. "AND the third day there was
a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: And
both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the marriage." Marriage
is honorable. Hebrews 13:4. "Marriage is honourable in all, and the
bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge."
Marriage is ordained of God. Doctrine and Covenants 49:15. "And again,
verily I say unto you, that whoso forbiddeth to marry is not ordained
of God, for marriage is ordained of God unto man." However, we are
asked not to marry outside the covenant if possible. Alma 3:8. "And
this was done that their seed might be distinguished from the seed of
their brethren, that thereby the Lord God might preserve his people,
that they might not mix and believe in incorrect traditions which
would prove their destruction." And finally, to forbid marriage is a
sign of apostasy. Doctrine and Covenants 49:15-16. "And again, verily
I say unto you, that whoso forbiddeth to marry is not ordained of God,
for marriage is ordained of God unto man. Wherefore, it is lawful that
he should have one wife, and they twain shall be one flesh, and all
this that the earth might answer the end of its creation." This is
again mentioned in 1 Timothy 4:2-3. "Speaking lies in hypocrisy;
having their conscience seared with a hot iron; Forbidding to marry,
and commanding to abstain from meats, which God hath created to be
received with thanksgiving of them which believe and know the truth."
"No woman will be condemned by the Lord for refusing to accept a
proposal which she feels she could not properly accept." -Joseph
Fielding Smith (Doctrines of Salvation II, P.77)
"In time only marriages; the mother takes her children with her dead
husband." -Joseph Fielding Smith (Doctrines of Salvation II, p.79)
All of this brings up a new question, What about divorce? Well, the Law of Moses allowed divorce. Deuteronomy 24:1. "When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house." In the New Testament Jesus also sets the condition of divorce. That condition was for fornication/adultery only. Matthew 5:31-32. "It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of adivorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." This is also mentioned again in Matthew 19:3-11. "The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give awriting of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given."
All this talk about marriage could naturally lead into the practice of plural marriage, but I will discuss that later if someone requests.
Ok, so this naturally leads into question/concern 2. Families? What
constitutes a family? Why are families so important?
What constitutes a family? Some families have consist of parents and
children. Let's start with the father. We are told to give heed to our
father's instruction. Proverbs 15:5. "A fool despiseth his father's
instruction: but he that regardeth reproof is prudent." We can then
naturally go right into children. A wise child pleases their parents.
Proverbs 15:20. "A wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish man
despiseth his mother."
Why are families so important? A family is a place where love is.
Proverbs 15:17. "Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a
stalled ox and hatred therewith."
What constitutes a family? Let me start by saying that "the family is
central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of His
children." (The Family-A proclamation to the world, presented by
President Gordon B. Hinkley at the September 23, 1995 General Relief
Society Meeting) Some families are just a husband and wife living
'together in the Lord'. 1 Corinthians 11:11-12. "Nevertheless neither
is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in
the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by
the woman; but all things of God." The husband is the head of the
household, but is commanded to love his wife. Ephesians 5:22-25.
"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of
the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church
is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in
every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave himself for it." This commandment of loving your wife
is also given to us in modern revelation. Doctrine and Covenants
42:22. "Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave
unto her and none else." (Since that 'cleave unto...none else' touches
upon adultery, I will take this opportunity to say that I will discuss
the law of chastity later upon request.) Some families consist of
parents and children. Let's start with the father. We are told to give
heed to our father's instruction. Proverbs 15:5. "A fool despiseth his
father's instruction: but he that regardeth reproof is prudent." We
can then naturally go right into children. A wise child pleases their
parents. Proverbs 15:20. "A wise son maketh a glad father: but a
foolish man despiseth his mother." The flip side of that coin is that
a foolish child brings grief to his parents. Proverbs 17:25. "A
foolish son is a grief to his father, and bitterness to her that bare
him." Now I am not trying to say that all children must obey even the
vilest of parents. Parents must be just. Proverbs 20:7. "The just man
walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him." We must
be just in order to keep our children because there are those that
have to forsake their family in order to become a follower of Christ.
Matthew 10:34-39. "Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I
came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at
variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and
the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man's foes shall
be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more
than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more
than me is not worthy of me. And he that taketh not his cross, and
followeth after me, is not worthy of me. He that findeth his life
shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it."
This concept is very simply stated in Luke 14:26. "If any man come to
me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and
brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my
disciple." So, children, obey your parents IN THE LORD. Ephesians 6:1.
"CHILDREN, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right."
Why are families so important? A family is a place where love is.
Proverbs 15:17. "Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a
stalled ox and hatred therewith." A family is a place where children
are taught the way they ought to behave. Proverbs 22:6. "Train up a
child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart
from it."
Perhaps we could answer both questions at the same time if we look at
this in a slightly different way. The duties of each person in the
family. Colossians 3:18-21. "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own
husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be
not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things:
for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your
children to anger, lest they be discouraged." So let's start with the
husbands. Love your wives. Love your children. Provide for them both.
1 Timothy 5:8. "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for
those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an
infidel." As with all important teachings, this is again stated in
modern revelation. Doctrine and Covenants 83:2-4. "Women have claim on
their husbands for their maintenance, until their husbands are taken;
and if they are not found transgressors they shall have fellowship in
the church. And if they are not faithful they shall not have
fellowship in the church; yet they may remain upon their inheritances
according to the laws of the land. All children have claim upon their
parents for their maintenance until they are of age." This providing
allows us the follow the Lord's council of staying out of debt. Romans
13:7-8. "Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute
is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour to whom
honour. Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that
loveth another hath fulfilled the law." Fathers and husbands are also
responsible to make sure that family prayer is had. 3 Nephi 18:18-21.
"Behold, verily, verily, I say unto you, ye must watch and pray always
lest ye enter into temptation; for Satan desireth to have you, that he
may sift you as wheat. Therefore ye must always pray unto the Father
in my name; And whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, which
is right, believing that ye shall receive, behold it shall be given
unto you. Pray in your families unto the Father, always in my name,
that your wives and your children may be blessed." Mothers and wives
are to love their husbands and children. They are primarily
responsible to teach the children. Teach them the gospel and the ways
of the Lord. Teach them to not fight and quarrel. 'Teach them to walk
in the ways of truth and soberness'. Mosiah 4:13-15. "And ye will not
have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably, and to
render to every man according to that which is his due. And ye will
not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will
ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel
one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or
who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he
being an enemy to all righteousness. But ye will teach them to walk in
the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one
another, and to serve one another." In olden times, mothers taught
their children well in the gospel. Alma 56:47-48 "Now they never had
fought, yet they did not fear death; and they did think more upon the
liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives; yea, they had
been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would
deliver them. And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers,
saying: We do not doubt our mothers knew it." We can use the following
as an analogy of a 'safe home' in the midst of 'the storms' of the
world. Ether 6:5-7. "And it came to pass that the Lord God caused that
there should be a furious wind blow upon the face of the waters,
towards the promised land; and thus they were tossed upon the waves of
the sea before the wind. And it came to pass that they were many times
buried in the depths of the sea, because of the mountain waves which
broke upon them, and also the great and terrible tempests which were
caused by the fierceness of the wind. And it came to pass that when
they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them,
their vessels being tight like unto a dish, and also they were tight
like unto the ark of Noah; therefore when they were encompassed about
by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth
again upon the top of the waters."
